1. Matthew McConaughey, episode 141.
Link here but fyi I think this particular unsolved mystery is really kind of disturbing even when delivered via a cheesy reenactment starring the “alright alright alright” guy from Dazed and Confused. It is now a solved mystery, thank heavens.
I watch a lot of Unsolved Mysteries, because it is really a very fine show. It makes me feel like an early nineties kid again. More specifically, it makes me feel like an early nineties kid who stayed up too late watching Unsolved Mysteries and now can’t fall asleep because she is convinced that El Chupacabra and Marilyn Monroe’s ghost are hiding under the bed arguing over who gets to suck the stuffing out of her teddy bear. It’s a good feeling. But anyhow, I have re-watched almost the entire series as an adult because I am AWESOME. I dozed off occasionally, but I am pretty sure that Matthew McConaughey is the only celebrity who was ever on the show. I am so glad that I am using my life to do very worthwhile things.
My daughter stared at this drawing a long time and said, somberly, “I wish the teddy bear couldn’t be scared.”
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